The Tired Dad Morning Reflections: Part 1

Raising Yourself Again

Good morning, tired dads (and tired moms).

I’m not sure when you’re reading this, but I’m writing it in the early morning—before the little humans I created wake up and start asking for the necessities of life. Something to eat, something to drink, something to wear. And, of course, their wants—something to watch, and possibly a declaration that they don’t want to get ready for school.

You may relate as you read this, or maybe your day looks different. Maybe your night looked different. Maybe the kids were up all night. Maybe your mind wouldn’t turn off. I’ve been through all those phases, and in my current one, I’ve learned that early mornings are the only moments of quiet before the beautiful chaos of parenthood takes over.

So here I am, a tired dad, presenting a morning reflection on parenthood.

The Parent You Always Wanted

[Funny that I’m learning to finally play the guitar at 39 years old with my 8 year old daughter]

What does it mean to raise our kids while, in a way, raising ourselves all over again?

I’m not sure if you had great parents, great parents who made some honest mistakes, parents who have apologized for what they got wrong and are now showing up as amazing grandparents, or if you had not-so-great parents—or even absent parents. But I think we can all agree that the goal is to move forward, heal, forgive (maybe not forget), and ultimately focus on being the best parent we can be to our children.

Sometimes, we feel like we are becoming the parent we always wanted, and it’s okay to say that. We can have empathy for our own parents—understanding that they did the best with what they were given—and at the same time, we can acknowledge what they did wrong, learn from it, and do better.

For some families, there’s a major generational curse that needs to be broken, and maybe you’re the one carrying that torch. If you had a great upbringing with active and loving grandparents in your child’s life, don’t feel guilty for having it good—just be mindful that there are always ways to improve.

But if you were the child who carried the burden of your parents’ well-being, if you constantly had to parent your own parent, if you still have to walk on eggshells to avoid their wrath—you know what you need to do. Boundaries.

Why? Because you aren’t going to be that parent. And you are no longer going to carry that burden. Your most important job, role, and responsibility is to be a great parent to your own children.

In a way, we’re getting a second chance to raise ourselves—not by forcing our kids to become who we wanted to be, but by becoming the healed, loving parent we longed for when we were young.

A Thought for the Day

The next time your child looks up at you—whether with joy, frustration, curiosity, or need—pause for a second. See yourself in them. Think about what the younger version of you needed in that moment.

And then be that person.

Because at the end of the day, that’s what this whole journey is about—not just raising good kids, but becoming better versions of ourselves in the process.

We aren’t perfect. We need to give ourselves grace. We won’t always get it right. But our intention is there, and we can try.

Thanks for being here. Thanks for showing up.

Now go drink that coffee while it’s still hot.

Until next time,
The Tired Dad